I have thought over this decision a long time. I don't know why and I feel I have not been able to give my thoughts enough space or room to consider them. There was a point in my life where I would know exactly why is something happening and I had control over everything, but now I feel miserable, I feel my life is all scattered in bits and pieces and its all a mess. In the course of time I felt I met someone and now that I want to go back I am limiting myself from being with that person. I feel I am holding myself back a little bit from getting hurt once again. But then I feel it is okay and you can't have everything you want until you experience falls and are ready to get hurt. I have come to the understanding that everything in life cannot be always perfect and that you have to learn to just accept this. Today in this world where social media has dominated, people are overloaded with a lot of information and they don't know what they want. Or at least they are choosing things as though. Well I know what I am doing. I don't like my job anymore and I feel I want to take a break and so I am going back to India. I am not yet sure what is it concrete that I am going to do once I go back but I will most probably spend time with family and friends and relax and try to rediscover myself and then start afresh! Amen!
